Inspired to Suicide
March 13, 2013 7 Comments
A few months back, I attended Start-up Weekend Hyderabad in South India to validate a few ideas I had in mind, to meet interesting people and experiment concepts under construction. Well, I’d rate the event’s crowd far below the average start-up crowd in Chennai or Mumbai. We ended runners and it wasn’t so much effort.. but I definitely wouldn’t rate worthy of its registration fee, despite the interesting organizers. They tried pulling mentors, the so-called ‘angel’ investors and a few more Finance guys to help the participants. (In India, the investors are a bunch of MBA guys without much background about Technology or the start-up environment. Listening to them actually made me realize that they meant only money unlike the Valley were a guy investing in a start-up would have had a hands-on experience starting up himself understanding the team dynamics or would have taught the Math/Management behind a start-up in a university or would have raised the VC amount exploring the future potential of a specific market.. but in India, investors aren’t necessarily like the ones in the Valley who also mentor and talk Technology, they were mostly similar to the bankers putting a bunch of Rupees on table into the most explored fields widely. It’s usually a common investment pattern in the e-commerce Service sector or Social Media contexts where they expect to scale with a huge volume. I haven’t met all of them, but this view is based on the few that I’ve met so far in ~3 cities. )
Anyway, apart from the investors disappointment, I started networking with a few guys and found a few interesting people to talk to. One of them was a 19 year old guy from the same city of Hyderabad who was looking for a way to start-up. He was quiet an aggressive networking guy and he wanted to talk to me after doing some due diligence on my background. Looks like he was trying to get into the Thiel Foundation’s 20 under 20 program (now called as the Thiel Fellowship) and I got really curious to know more about him since only a very few in India have known it. So, we sat aside to talk for a few minutes at dinner with my Team Mates. From the few minutes of conversation, I could guess he was smart, was good at networking and was familiarizing himself with the big names in the valley. Then we started talking about his past. It startled me when I started realizing what he had done.
When Admiration roots too deep as Imitation
So, this guy dropped out of college (a decent one) claiming that it wasn’t making sense. He was proudly claiming that he makes not many friends because he was rude and arrogant. He started to mention that he avoided the not-so-bright ones in his circle and would only talk to people who were smart or intelligent because he thought many were a non-sense and would waste his time. He started to mention that he was having a “disruptive” idea to “revolutionize” publishing industry and that he was looking for a programmer/coder. He added that he was good at coding but wasn’t quiet interested in doing it full-time. He was wearing a Blue Jean and a Black Tees (it wasn’t a turtleneck, though). Half way through his story, I realized that he was trying to replicate the life of Steve Jobs. He was so much influenced by the man that he started imitating his entire character and lifestyle based on the versions mentioned in the books. This was when I realized how many such inspired smart minds have killed their own original Character trying to be someone they are truly not.
Having read the biography of Steve Jobs, I could find so many acts of imitations in his attempt to copy Jobs: style of dressing, speaking, self-proclamation of similar flaws and dropping out in Second Year of College… This guy in his true nature was probably a very good person, but in his fantasized world inspired by Jobs, he was Jobs, the ghastly visionary and so he tried to imitate him consciously every day in every way.
When we started talking about Jobs an instant sense of comparison cropped into his face and he began to find excuses to have not become him so far. I could guess he was possessive and he started defending his self-made version of Jobs. He started to talk about how Jobs was lucky to have found an ingenious Steve Wozniak next door to build Apple’s first few versions and that he had the resources closer to him including the universities that worked on incredible stuff. (Also, I am guessing that his choice to work on publishing industry must have been inspired from the same book.)
Suicidal Immolation – Character Immolation
I could very well understand him because I was someone similar a while back trying to race up with inspirations. The intent wasn’t usually the culprit, the mind was commonly that tricky savage. In our mind, we start with an early reference to an inspirational character, then we begin to compare with them, and finally we try to imitate them consciously or unconsciously to improve our self-esteem forgetting the reality that we quash our true self to do that. In this process, we end up living our life like someone else by consciously committing to burn our character in order to accommodate the newly found fascination of another character or identity. A suicide is not only about killing one’s own flesh and blood, but also killing one’s own true character and values. Failing to recognize our true gifts and talents, missing to explore ourselves by killing a sound mind that thinks on its own is definitely a redefinition of Suicide through character immolation or mind-murder by consent.
An inspiration is supposedly a version of admiration of someone when one could relate to that “hero”. When life gives lemon, these inspirations make us more optimistic to walk past that day just like in their history. They are stimulants who encourage us to push beyond our limits. These stimulants in small qualities are good to get away from pain or disappointment but an overdose could cause death to one’s own character, a true self. It takes a while to realize that one is under this addiction till someone asked a question, “Don’t you like you?”. May be they should read this book to realize that there is no hard and fast rule to the commonly acclaimed ‘success’ or ‘inspiration’ and that there are only a few basic principles. It is no book of psychology, but it points out the straight facts that all Great Men were not all having the same ‘Rags to riches’ story and that every person and every character have their own great story. We hear a lot more about Rags-to-riches, because that’s what draws more attention, that’s what the larger mass can relate to and that’s what sells more books for the publishing companies. But in reality, every single person have their own self to embrace, celebrate, to be proud of, to look in the mirror and smile at and probably to write their own biography to be looked at. Originality has far more value than a complete replication.
Steve Jobs’ story is definitely inspirational proving that even a college drop out can create a ‘revolutionary’ company. This explores the possibility of an exception and that there are no rules. Unfortunately, the overly inspired addicts misunderstand this as a rule to imitate, just like this guy. Remembering Oscar Wilde’s quote, “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness”, one needs to understand that imitation only leads to a proof of mediocrity rather than an attempt to greatness. I’ve come across so many trying to replicate Jobs’ style while on stage and I’ve always wondered where their personal statement or style was and where their imagination was. Have they probably killed it already? It is good to have an inspiration but one needs to make sure to draw a line between admiration and replication so that one doesn’t end up becoming that mediocre copycat. Trying to replicate a hero killing the real hero within us is a definite suicide that we don’t want to regret in our later years.
This guy I met is probably not the only one. He probably has a ton of company in this world of Admiration Addicts. I felt sorry for his state and I really hope that he wakes up soon and embraces his true character. I hope that he doesn’t loose much of his age trying to live as someone forgetting his real character and value. I can only hope and wish.
Note: The title to this blog was inspired from Emerson’s quote, “Imitation is suicide”.
About Divya Sornaraja
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Just to be the devil, imitating greatness is in some ways better than being originally mediocre. Better to follow everything Steve did and fail than to go by the book and make no change. Chances are, if you imitate someone like Steve Jobs, you are gonna get chopped. He was a total mess at his worst. His tantrums and weeping publicly are juvenile to say the least. Steve Jobs learnt to mellow down in his second coming but he was still driven by the purpose. He was willing to be the bad guy if that’s what it takes to build amazing products which he so badly wanted to do before he dies. His sense of urgency was one of the primary driving forces even at his early age. He always knew death was coming and he had little time left, even in his thirties. He was wiser that way because he did more with a bunch of people than most other companies could have ever done.
You can’t paint a cow and make it a horse. To make something a horse, you need to change its DNA. To imitate Steve, one needs to understand the roots, the source of his actions, his deeper thought World. Why was he a vegetarian, why did he believe that the herbs would cure his cancer and delayed the treatment which could have extended his life, Why was he ruthless at times. Imitating action is superficial especially when your core is different. When your beliefs are not aligned. At best, you’ll feel the heat that Steve did. But, you need the whole other thing to be effective at imitating Steve – Strong sense of purpose, utter disgust for anything superfluous, the craving for purity in everything and whole lot of other deeper principles and his understanding. Leave the core and imitate him and all you are is a college dropout. No Steve, no entrepreneur.
a) What’s wrong with mediocre? It’s all the way you present and market. Please remember that it is also the way you look. One might be mediocre to me but might be an extraordinaire to you. Take Rajinkanth for example, there are the ones who idolize him and the ones who completely mock at him. Perspectives differ. Also, one can “change” anything being anyone. There is no bottom-line definition to greatness, right? For me, a ‘mediocre’ dad educating his son is changing another life or may be more than one. If to be on the cover of TIME magazine or to have a bunch of fan boys is the only definition of making a “change”, then I guess there is a lot of ignorance.
b) “Better to follow everything Steve did and fail than to go by the book and make no change.”:The funny thing in this line is, what you are doing is nothing but “follow” another book, isn’t it? Isn’t that mediocre? Isn’t that following another herd? Do you honestly think a mind that can’t think on it’s own and create/prove a new possibility will be considered “great” or making a “change”?
c) His inspiration is commending indeed. But what applies to bull may not apply to a bear. A bear needs to know what his strengths and weaknesses are to become even remotely respected. Also, a bear’s environment is much different than that of a bull.
d) It is important to distinguish a principle, a trait and a character separately. If a mind can’t decide what’s good and necessary and what’s useless, then how is that not mediocre? It’s like you don’t know what to buy, so you buy the entire shop.
e) Ignorance: Have you read about other great change-makers? Say, Md. Yunis, Henry Ford, Craig Venter, Dean Kamen, or any other? You’d actually realize that these men are “revolutionaries” and “visionaries” too. But they don’t market themselves the way Steve did. Try reading about a variety of wonderful people, you will find that there is no hard and fast rule to make a change at all. It is nothing but the WILL that is important. 🙂
Also, I hope you also know that without Regis McKenna or Guy Kawasaki or the extraordinary talent pool, Steve Jobs wouldn’t have meant anything today. Without a foundation, a building is nothing. Also, sometimes what is written in books may not be the actual reality.
I hope you aren’t like the kid I met. I really hope beyond this faint reasoning, you explore and make the change that you want to see. Wishing you the best and thanks for the comment and an alternate perspective.
Very neatly presented thoughts Divya.
Let me start with your initial observations about the start up weekend. MBA grads over here in India are just taught to mean money and nothing else. So the way in which management or business is taught, is bit dicey. I still have the caselet with me in which i have written with pen, “How accountant screw the world” in Managerial Accounting course at the end of the class.
Regarding the imitation part, youngsters are falling prey to it very easily since they have an easy option of picking specific data which reinforces their view concretely by the way of ICT and other means.
I know nothing about the guy whom you are referring to but it would be better if he realizes it sooner and channels his passion efficiently, so that may be some other guy in near future, say in some African country may try to Imitate this guy’s yet to be born “Originality”.
Super super super
The essence in above context is really true . To add up with, i have also heard a relatively same story from one of my colleague who worried about his son.. My colleague was so lenient and he always encouraged his son to do wat ever he likes. That guy was studying 11th class at that time . he gets pretty good marks and studied well . then he got chance to read Chetan bhagat’s 5 Point someone.. After reading the book he got completely inspired in a negative way that reading subject books and attending classes wont help to succeed . Hence there was a drastic change in his attitude.. He was not obeying anyone and went in a wrong direction imitating the characters. eventually he got struck up in between his 12th class due to some indisciplinary activity and have to broke his studies for one more year. His father is so generous and polite and in such a way that he got to councel his son in a friendly way. That guy told the whole story behind the change in his attitude and felt bad and sorry for being so. he also realised that book also tells us to do things what we are more fond of and as per our ambition. thus he is now in his way to become a CA as per his wish..
Hi Divya. Nice reading. But just one thought. These guys are just planning to make money out of technology. So if that were the goal, losing self identity doesn’t matter. If they were to revolutionize the world or something, then inspiration WITHOUT suicide could help, and get them an unique image. Just wanted to know your thoughts on this.
Hi Karthick. From a general perspective, the ones that tend to replicate an inspiration, usually has similar intentions. So, I am not sure if I’d profile them to be just money makers. They are usually in it for the “glory” and the fan following admiration. As for character trade off for money, even in that case, an individual’s circumstance and situation are unique and the way they handle them requires a personal trait. So, I’d say, they wouldn’t go too far with such a trade off.